“It’s a choice in your mind to tell your heart that no matter what you’re going through, God can still be glorified in that circumstance because He can. It is only whether you have the eyes to see it and the will to allow it.” – Pastor Derek Ma
In the labyrinth of her mind and heart, she seeks the way out of the messiness of her emotions. God can be glorified in this circumstance. How? Only He knows, but she must step aside and allow Him access to her heart. Healing cannot be done apart from Him. In this healing, she will discover what He seeks from her.
These emotions are not the end all, be all. This time she is walking through is not the end of her story. God has not calmed the storm. This is likely the most uncomfortable storm she has ever attempted to sail through. But He is meeting her where she is. He is not removing her from the storm, He has come into the storm with her.
With Him, she is safe. She must learn to see past the waves that beat about in front of her — the waves of heartache, longing, despair, emotional sufferings, desires — the waves that block her from seeing her LORD. He is in the storm with her. She wants to let Him on her boat. She wants Him to steer her to where He wants her to go.
He desires to heal her heart, to present her with one made of malleable flesh. In order to do so, He must break the rock-hard heart she has given herself. He has, and it hurts. But after He is finished, her heart will be one that can love exponentially. She will be able to love from her entire heart, not just the parts she allows others to see: the parts that are still unscarred as a result of the defense she has built around them.
Her heart beats and cries for China, for Hong Kong. Give me the youth of Hong Kong. Let me not be remembered as anything more than a girl who loved others because she love You the most.
In her mind, she sees her heart shrouded in a veil. She’s afraid of showing it to others, fearing the sneers and criticism she will receive when they see the battered little heart that should have nothing left. She would rather leave it there so no one would know just how many scars and cuts and bruises made home there.
But He wants her heart. The heart that had been trampled on and forgotten about is the heart that the King of the universe wants to set His throne upon, to make His home in. Beneath the veil, He reveals to her a heart that is whole, a heart that is radiant, a heart that is beautiful.
This is her heart. The scars that were once adorned on its surface have been healed by her Savior. These storms that were meant to batter and break and dirty this heart have caused it to shine even more radiantly than it once had.
This is her heart. This is His home. There is still healing that must take place before He can send her to her people to do His will. Her people will not know her as His did not know Him.
But He knows her.
And He will meet her in the storm.