eyes to see

“When ‘important’ individuals go away we are sad, until we see that they are meant to go, so that only one thing is left for us to do – to look into the face of God for ourselves.” – Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest

It is strange that she is alone. She has not had her father in her life for many years. She does not know who he is, what he stands for. Yet it breaks her heart to see him leave her behind. Her mother she loves dearly, but she has also failed and wounded her heart. She loves her but feels as though she cannot trust her like she used to.

Yet in all of this, she has not felt particularly lonely. She has not felt that she is left alone in this world. Her family has changed so that she can more easily see who God is without having to look through the lens of other people. If she tried to see God in the relationships she’s had with various people, she would never see Him for who He is.

He is the only one in her life story up till this point that has never left her behind or failed her. He breaks her rock-solid heart in order to mold it and give her one that is whole and beautiful.

She hopes that at least her mother would come back into her life as a more permanent presence, but more than anything, she hopes her mother will run with all her desperation and need into His arms. He misses her more than anyone else, including this daughter she has. His heart has been broken, but He will see it to be worth it when she comes back to Him. What is it going to take?

No matter what happens in the future, she knows that He is the only one that she can and should love with all her heart, mind, soul, and strength. And she can see Him clearly now without any disturbances that filter His image to her heart. She can see His face as it is: one of a Father, a Friend, a Lover. Her lenses are her own eyes.

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