how am i doing?

I think that asking someone how someone else is doing is an important thing to do. It definitely is. It shows the person you are asking that you genuinely care.

But it seems like some times, this is just a default question. What else can you ask? And then sometimes we don’t bother to hear the answer to our question.

And for those who answer… what should we say? Fine? Good? Well (that’d be proper English)? We usually default to these ones.

The question “how are you doing?” has been thrown at me a lot during these past couple of days. This past week. This past month. I’m almost numb to it, it seems. I don’t think there’s really another question that anyone can think of to ask. I can’t think of anything either.

How am I doing?

I wish to God I knew.

But as the initial shock is wearing off, I’m starting to feel again. Angry. Frustrated. Tired. Numb. Peace. Worry. Faithful. Confused. Unknowing.

That is what I’m beginning to feel.

But how do I voice this?

How are you doing? I’m angry.

How are you doing? I’m sad.

How are you doing? I’m holding on for dear life.

How are you doing? I’m scared.

How are you doing? I’m worried.

How are you doing? I’m tired.

How are you doing? … I don’t know anymore.

This is how I’m doing.

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